26 Oktober 2016 12:35 WIB
Absence and Solitude
One afternoon, in a quiet homey street around Orchard Road. She walked alone straight to the red building-bar. She has a friend that works there as a bartender. At that time, the bartender was her friend. But before, he had ever been her boyfriend once. So, he is her ex then becomes her very good friend. She made a slight smile for him from the entrance to the front of the counter desk. They said hello and kissed each other cheeks. Actually, he was waiting for her coming.
"How are you?" asked the bartender. "You're lucky. I have a bottle of pearl wine for us."
"I never change. Oh, it such an exaggeration. So Epicurean. I am enough with a bottle of Jack. Thanks. And how about you?"
"I never change too." He smiled in a glimpse and served a drink for his special guest in front of the counter. And he didn't lie about the wine.
For a moment, they enjoyed small talk in the same time the bartender worked for other costumers. She sat patiently waiting for the absence of his duty. The jazz in her ears and the wine in her mouth covered the world in hedonistic taste. For a moment, she enjoyed things that she used to resist lately. She didn't realize that the bartender took an attention frequently to her. It took several minutes more before he could bring his face to her face.
"Did I bother you relaxation?" he said, staring.
"No. You've just created it. I am so unfamiliar with solitude. Such is relaxation." She smiled bitterly.
"Should I ask you the reason behind your previous expression? It seemed very ironic." He jerked to the wine. "What did you do to her, traitor?"
When the bartender's eyes started back to hers. She said briefly. "I'm lost, Compass, as usual. You're my North and my South. I wanna talk a bit if you're not busy."
"And you're always the voice inside my head. Baby, there is no good time for everything than the present time, this sec, now. I can't lead you to the right path, but I will show you the North and the South. Then, as usual, you will leave the door and go anywhere you want."
"Something I wanna say is you. You seem fine, never have a problem, never lost. You're not a good playwright to do such fake acts. I know you. Doesn't it kill you as it kills me? Or, is it true? You have no soul, nor heart?"
"I loved you once yesterday. I have heart and soul. I love you now and later. I have heart and soul. What is the significance of that question? I am an open book. What do you want to know about me?"
"I admire you."
"I admire you too."
"You live with a venomous serpent that I always resist. The absence of someone you love, ignorance and sincerity. They are not my things to keep my heartbeats. I can't through the life like yours. You're a warrior and I'm a worrier. You're stronger than me. You dare to be lost in love. You have wings and eyes like an eagle. You're cruel with every single reality. You're brutally honest and far from artificialness. You fight for the one you love. Those things. Much more I can't describe."
"My days are the absence of someone I keep in my heart. I miss him. I love him. I realized that we have no chance anymore, like us. But I can't breathe the air without the existence of my love. I mean, the shadow and the memory of him. I can't live with a solitude like you. Your heart is free. Never belong to anyone and it makes you always great. You're independent. You never feel suffocated in loving and missing someone. You're a flying eagle in the sky. Free and painless. Maybe it's true as you said you have a heart. But it's empty and untouchable. You're an innocent rascal. I can't through the life like yours. It kills me."
He poured the wine from the bottle to her icy glass, to make it cold. There was a smile in his lips to calm down the fire in her eyes.
"Am I a fool in this anecdote?" she cried impatiently.
He laughed. "If you're a fool, who the hell I am!"
Karya : Rizkika Mahzura Aurora