This is the dilemma faced by parents in the present times. This is a very grey area where there are no clear answers as to which approach is best. There is no denying that children have been taught to be independent decision makers to be able to face the world properly. However, from what stage , what age and on what issues this has to be taught is the real question. In a conservative or religious society like Indonesia this becomes more important. There are many taboos on different aspects of food, clothes etc which have to be explained to the children. In my family, my sister started giving pocket money to her children at 13 years of age. She gave her children independence to spend the money as they liked but did keep a check on what they were spending the money. So it was a mix of allowing children to spend as they like yet keeping a check how they did it. Nowdays, children are better informed on various things through internet and other media and are better equipped to make independent decisions.I believe, that a calibrated approach works best which balances need for independence with guidance. We have to trust children will make right decisions provided we give right guidance and advice. Also children should be taught to trust parents and ask for advice if they face a difficult situation which they are unable to handle on their own.