just hangin'

Indah Suryani
Karya Indah Suryani Kategori Catatan Harian
dipublikasikan 21 Februari 2016
just hangin'

For the first time we called it mistake, if it happened again then you?re a fool. Or a moron, maybe in a little bit hard word.

Let?s call me one, foolish or a moron you choose. That?s okay for me.
I failed once before this. Hurt? Fucking yes! I was like giving up my whole world at that time. I thought. But I was wrong. I survived.
Now, I?ve got a huntch. Don?t want to say too soon but seems clear eneough. It?s scarier than before. Consume more energy, broke my heart, kill my brain, down my health.
I?m just afraid to choose

It was thing that I already knew since my first huntch, thet he won?t coming.
After he broke one promise to another. I?m just looks like a fool and got nothing to do except to regret.
A mistake, the same thing I did before, seems I never learn, lesson never learned.
Pityfull. I was hanging myself on a thin thread. I know I should let go but too afraid to loose.
Draining my soul.
Taking pills to get enough sleeps, too much to eat and get fat, I do travel in search of peace of minds. But they?re not working. When I got back to my bed, lay on my pillow and grab my monkey dolls and fall asleep? next I wake up and just found myself in love again. Just can?t let go. And it hurts me the most

why can we just get along like we used to be? how could things just shattered like i never see them before? we've gone too far, or just me, i have no idea. looks like fooling myself all over again. is there another word for disappointment?

sometimes we are not smart enough to learn or just we playing deaf for all that good damn advices!

?

credit foto? https://www.google.com/search?client=firefox-a&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&channel=sb&biw=1352&bih=633&tbm=isch&sa=1&btnG=Search&q=rope+hang#imgrc=yYfHrDz-51rUjM:

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